Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Flashbacks of Fall

My memory card decided to die completely yesterday, and not before loosing 20 or so great shots I took yesterday. So, left without brand new pictures (OH NO) I am relying on some old favorites to get me through until this weekend when I can buy a new one.

This was Illusia in all her glory last fall. She was 5 months old, had little hair but a lot of giggles. The weather was very nice and she loved practicing her sitting skills and playing with leaves.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Ice Ice Baby

We were far too busy yesterday and missed the whole words and Wednesdays extravaganza but we did have some cool times behind the scenes. Or trying to stay cool times anyway... It has been near 100 degrees plus humid these last few days. It is the humidity that makes true misery, I think. The heat is more tolerable when it does not cause a layer of baste on your skin and stick to the insides of your throat on every inhale.

We have been staying inside during afternoons, it is just too much 'ARGH IT'S HOT' annoyance, but we have ventured out a little at morning and evening time. We waded through the water at the Segwick Co. Park before heading off to the playgrounds for some hard core playing time.
The most awesome thing was the fact that we got there at just the right time for FREE ICE CREAM. I kid you not!!! I am not sure if there is anything more cool (all puns intended) on the face of the Earth than a melty ice cream sandwich and a sweet little pumpkin to share it with.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

14 Months, 1 Day

Illusia turned 14 months old yesterday (when I wanted to make this post!). In the last month she has gotten 6 new teeth, her first real brush with sickness, learned to walk, say 'bye bye' when she waves, 'mine mine mine' when she finds a toy she likes and can make the sign for 'potty' sometimes (with varying degrees of success actually going on the potty) 'food' and 'drink' (also, sometimes) and give hugs to say thank you.

I remember when she was 6 months and we were in McDonalds (for a playdate in the playroom) and there was a little 14 month old girl there walking around and smiling, giggling and trying to pick things up off the floor to eat. I remember wondering if Illusia would ever get to that age. I mean... I knew she would, it just seemed so far away for my baby who just learned to sit up and just became interested in toys.

6 month old beauty
Now she is 14 months old and is walking around and communicating with me in ways other than crying, screaming or whining. Is very interested in toys. Is very interested in everything. It is kind of amazing. So is the fact that in 4 months she will be 1½, in 10 months she will be 2. Just a wow moment that came a lot sooner than I thought it would. I am just so awed by her right now.

The reason that I did not get this posted yesterday and the reason I slept through story time this morning, (which made me bummed because sick or not I was looking forward to taking her :(. ) I have had a bad ear ache, head ache, dizziness, weakness and general crappiness for the last few days and for a while I kept getting so confused (had a fever also, apparently) that even blogging seemed to hard. Yesterday was the worst and after trying a couple times and re-reading what I wrote... and realising it made no sense, I gave up and spent the day watching Lie To Me eps on Netflix.

In between entertaining my very not sick honey bunches who managed to take every single toy out of her toy bin and scatter them amongst the room, unroll a roll of paper towel and toilet paper, stick her hands down her diaper and get an !emergency bath! and basically totally take advantage of my not-so-alert condition. I do seem to be feeling better now, though I am officially obsessed with reading people's facial expressions, lol.

We are going to the park later and hopefully I have an update with cute pictures of a girl who just started her 14th month. I cannot wait for what the next 30 29 days has is store for us. :)

Friday, June 18, 2010

Behind Blue Eyes


My belle princesse has been doing well recently, a bit moody because of the still teething aspect but she has seemed to be entertained by our recent excursions. One such outing was on Tuesday, after story time we went to the conveniently located park right next door and before getting too tired and cranky she enjoyed a few minutes of swinging and playing around inside a giant plastic hippo full of woodchips.

The pictures actually remind me of what a flower might see if looking up from the ground---if said flower actually resided in a giant plastic hippo at the park. ;)

On Thursday we went to the Exploration Place Playgrounds that I never knew existed before now. It was suppose to be a playgroup, that I majorly failed to be a part of---I knew no one and no one said a single word to me--- but I bit back my sadness and took cute pictures and enjoyed Illusia's enthusiasm. She did more walking than she ever has and only fell once the entire time. She is getting to be such a big girl!

This inquisitive, awesome little girl kept showing off for us and being nice to Illusia, she even showed her how to look into the mirrors. Very sweet kiddo.

I was surprised at how much Illusia loved the fountains, even though she got briefly upset when it surprise attacked her and got her soaking wet, You gotta watch out for those fountains that secretly wish they were ninja's!

Overall I liked the day, I got a lot of cute pictures and even a couple videos of my girl playing and it was a nice park I might go back to sometime. It did hurt my feelings and make me uncomfortable to feel like an outsider, yet again. But it is not others fault that I am too socially inept to make friends. It is a lot easier to swallow with Illusia's sweetness around, that's for sure.


Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Something Old, Something New

This is one of my favorite photos I have ever taken. It features a 3 month Illusia and a 3 week kitten I was fostering at the time, Rainart. I just adore it. And you know what? It has very little to do with photography techniques, composition, color or tune. Those things play a small part, but the main thing that grabs me personally is the emotion that it encompasses.
I love to take photos. I have always loved to take photos. There are of course many people with better cameras, props, more skill than I have and may ever have and to be honest... sometimes that does bother me, make me feel inferior. I have to remind myself that I take pictures because I enjoy it. My life does not have less meaning nor are my memories less important because they are not taken with a $800.00+ DSLR and a custom lens.
I have to remember that I cherish the process of capturing a moment. Like a slip of perfection in a single second, now eternal. I love taking my photos and editing them, bringing out the hues and colors, the hidden loveliness. With luck and a little patience, the more I take the more I will improve. But improvement in and of itself along with the chase for perfection is not necessarily needed to find joy behind the lens.
As for that picture; right now, at this moment I am SO happy with the shot. It captures the beautiful delicacy of infants, the softness of sharing a sleepy-eyed moment and the heart-fluttering reverence of being alive and I can not think of a single thing to add to that.

Words + Wednesday + Linkies:

Monday, June 14, 2010

Music Maker

Things have been a bit slow around here lately as far as adventure goes. Since Illusia has been feeling better and is already 3½ teeth bigger (including one 1st molar) and over her bout of HFMD you would think we would be having more fun. But, everyday we manage to get out it seems to storm and the only adventure we've had lately is putting together a toy bin, a trip to the grocery store and a HOT HOT couple hours of garage sailing!

Tomorrow we are going to story time at the library though, so that should be something. I am thinking of 'making' Grandma A. take pictures of the event, just to have something to share. I always get kind of VERY nervous going to places like that, closed in with other people, even mommies. Our first day was two weeks ago and we missed last week because of Illusia feeling sick, so now I feel all out of the loop again, not that I was ever in it.

See, though I do not talk about it here I have Social Anxiety Disorder (also called Social Phobia.) Add to the mix that I am naturally a very shy and introverted girl you have a total social misfit, lol. So, I really do not know if I will ever make friends around this area. Other people seem to communicate so easily and I always just feel like an awkward spectator, not ever really connecting with anyone. The whole thing just makes me so frustrated, if my baby were not with me I doubt if anyone would say one word to me (or me to them.)

Luckily, I do have my baby girl so I can just concentrate on her having a good time and try to block out all the negative feelings of judgment and not fitting in. Speaking of her and getting my mind out of the awkward place we DID go garage sailing in Derby as they had city-wide garage sales and we manged to find some great stuff for about 5 bucks total.

Aside from the temperatures near 100 it was a pretty good day. I ran across a woman with a free baby/toddler toys box and got a couple goodies like a red picture die and a fake cellphone. Then we ventured out into the country and found a huge sale of kids stuff and got some really nice stuff for 2 dollars total. Several stuffed animals, kids cds, a couple books, 2 new swimming suits, some summer clothes and my girl's favorite: a 10 cent xylophone.

She loves to play it all the time and it is so adorable. I am convinced this means she is going to grow up to be a musician. So, what if she has a rather unique way of playing it?  I think that makes her all the more awesome and creative.

Surely, she has the dignified grace of a pianist, right?

Friday, June 11, 2010

New Layout

WOW, a brand new layout for Fanged Faerie Princess! It only took me a few hours overnight to make the layout (based on 3 column minima) but several days of tweaking in between a teething/sick toddler to add the content. (Mentioning that Illusia is doing really well again and is back to her old self. leaving a trail of spilled food, torn paper and pixie dust in her wake. :))

Be sure to check out the new and revamped pages, added lots of new pics, videos, poems and working on the art page today. I hope everyone finds the more simple layout easier to navigate, faster to load and a LOT easier to comment on. Please, anyone that has a problem with commenting or anything else related to this blog let me know on my new contact page.

Feel free to shower me with compliments tell me what you think!

Do you have a new layout or update on your blog that you would like to share? Let me and any visitor know by adding your link here:

Monday, June 7, 2010

Company Hates Misery

I cannot stand to watch my baby suffer, it just sucks so much and yesterday evening, all night long and this morning was so Hellish for her and everyone around her! (me and her Grandma A.) She not only is teething 6 teeth but also came down with Hand, foot, and mouth disease at the same time! The world has a cruel irony for such a little girl! ;(

She had a slight fever I attributed to teething (she had a little one last time with no other symptoms) and I attributed the fussiness and pain to all those teeth popping through until around yesterday afternoon when I just knew something was off. I just felt that this was not her normal behavior. She barely ever really cries truthfully. She does whine a lot at times, but crying only happens when she is extremely tired or hurt. When she is in pain she usually just wants held, nursed more often and is extra clingy and grumpy... Last night she was almost screaming in pain from around 11pm to 3am straight. Nothing other than walking the floors would comfort her. Needless to say, my feet really hurt.

I kept going back to the fact that I am a first time mom, I don't know what teething is like. I hear all these horrible stories and I think well, maybe it is just her teeth and this amount of pain and fussiness is normal. But something in my gut told me this was NOT a normal reaction for her, it must be more than that. So this morning we took her to the ER and they found the characteristic white ringed blisters all over her throat, under her tongue and she also had one between her little toes. I feel so guilty for waiting and not taking her yesterday when I knew something was wrong, when she would barely drink, not touch even Popsicles and cold yogurt, when she tried to nurse but found it too painful.

I feel horrible that all that suffering was because I didn't discover the truth soon enough or not act fast enough when I started suspecting something was wrong. Her fever broke yesterday so that means she already had it 2-3 days beforehand and I did not ever know....I realise her 6 teeth played a part in masking the symptoms but as the doctor went to go write out the perscription I broke down, I just started crying thinking about how much pain she must have been in and how stupid I was for not rushing her in yesterday. I feel I failed an important test in mommyhood.

My only small comfort is that the medicine worked fast and well and after taking it (and letting it set into her owies) she ate two cups of yogurt, some cereal and drank some juice and is taking a long, peaceful nap. She will have this up to a week so it will be a long one.

Heartbreaking face, directly before medicine. I was actually NOT attempting to capture her misery, I was trying to get a good pic of her cute shirt which says 'peace begins with a smile.'

20 minutes after medicine and still sleeping soundly 2.5 hours later!

The shaky 5/6 teeth verdict is finally IN--- she has 4 Lateral Incisors and 2 first molars popping though at once. In 2 unrelated matters A. I am sure this post is riddled with typos, going on 3 hours of sleep here and B. The opening of my new layout has been pushed back a couple more days as I have more important things on my mind. Expect a lot of new pages and cute Illi Berry fun when it does though.

Think happy pain free thoughts for Illusia!!!!

Friday, June 4, 2010

Bath of Glitter

I took this for I Heart Faces (IHF) - Barefoot Week.
I pretty much fail with textures, but this turned out decent, simple and soft.
Texture itself is from night-fate-stock @ dA


In other exciting news Illusia is still teething but being a real champ about it IMO. I would probably be laying on the bed all day crying 'why me' with my head under a pillow if I had 5 teeth coming in. She mostly just wants to be held more and is extra sensitive/cranky... Also, we are getting new internet service today! BYE BYE CRICKET!! I will not miss your extreme slowness and frequent disconnections. Nor will I miss your bill as I am now paying half the price for 6 times the speed.

One more thing, I found out that my layout is causing the problems with FF comments and it is driving me nuts so expect a brand new look coming in the next couple days (or so)!

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

A Matter of Days

My little girl is teething up a storm today. Getting 6 teeth at once, including her 1st molars and they are all at different stages of pushing though. :( If that were not enough she has a complimentary fluctuating teething fever. Needless to say, she is a bit cranky and not really in the mood for picture taking.

As she finally napped I found myself lamenting on the past (again) and looking through old photos of her. I started thinking about how each day that goes by she amazes me somehow, how each day I learn something new about or from her. Then I started thinking about how we are all made up of days...

 2 days

102 days

 197 days

293 days

She is
407 days today.

Playing along:
Wordful Wednesday @ Seven Clown Circus
Wordless Wednesday @ lots of places (thanks to Hobo Mama)
& Wednesday of Few Words @ A Lot Of Loves 
*NOTE the post below that the comment issue in FF has not yet been resolved. I contacted Disqus and am waiting for a reply. Please use IE to comment if possible until it is fixed!*